Friendship & keys

Can people still make new friends when they are no longer in a school-like environment?

What is the definition of a friend? How has it changed over time? Did people in the older generations have closer friendships than people in the younger generations?

At what point in a relationship does an acquaintance become a friend? How do you know this?


It is extremely difficult for people who are no longer in school or college to make new "friends", however you wish to define that term. People often advise those wishing to find new friends to join clubs or pursue their interests and they will automatically find like-minded people who could potentially become friends. This sounds logical, but this seldom happens in practice. One reason is that there are many weird people out there. So in order to protect themselves, people do not to open up much to strangers that they do not know well. This is self preservation and is a natural reaction. Another reason is that people often already have a well established group of friends and do not feel the need to add to that group.

I have a theory that friendships were better in the good old days when people knew each other for many years from childhood onwards. This may be due to the fact that a long time ago, most people grew up and remained in the communities in which they were born. These days in which mobility is within reach of the masses, friends are strewn across the country or across the globe. Everyone is so wrapped up in their own lives or busy with their careers. It's such a shame to lose contact with those whom you once thought were your friends. However at times, friends can disappoint you and get on your nerves as well.

An acquaintance becomes a friend when you are both on the same wavelength and you enjoy talking to one another. Between good friends there exists a level of trust. You trust the other person enough to share personal experiences and stories with them. You feel comfortable enough to call them up without notice and ask them if they want to hang out or just meet up
for a coffee. You just know when an acquaintance has friend potential, but often it's a little dicey because you don't know if the person really wants to hang out with you or if they are just being nice when they talk to you. Someone has to go out on a limb and ask if the other person wants to hang out. It is often then that an acquaintance becomes a friend.

What are your thoughts on these questions?

******************************************

It's been three months now since I first started blogging regularly and I am as amazed as you are that I have kept it up. :-) Admittedly, some days I am just scrambling to find something to talk about in this blog or desperately seeking something interesting to take a picture of. I also have to work, which leaves me precious little time for my own creative pursuits of which this is one. With this backdrop, I will segue into a slightly funny column I read in sfgate today. I only found certain passages funny, mind you. It discusses man bags. I think the columnist Jon Carroll was as desperate as I occasionally am when I need to find something to blog about. Imagine if you had to write a column everyday and had to be witty every single day. You'd be searching everywhere frantically for suitable topics as well and some attempts are more successful than others. :-)

Finally I come to my picture of the day. It is a bunch of keys and keychains of various shapes and sizes. What is on your key ring? It tells a lot about you whether you know it or not.